Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
