you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
