Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
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