Your tits are I can't wait for
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He? As in you personified your dick?
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