I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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