Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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