He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
