Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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