i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Randomize