I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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