My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
