Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Randomize
