It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
