what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
