Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
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While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
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