I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
