I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
