very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
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