We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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