No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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