The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I need to align my fucking chakras
Randomize
