Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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