did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
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