dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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