I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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