so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize