Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
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