He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
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