I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
