So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
