ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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