You just made me feel so damn special
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize