i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
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i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize