yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize