Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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