Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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