so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
