She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Randomize
