hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
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