2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize