I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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