it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
