I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize