That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
