Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
