Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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