whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
