Is it normal to miss your booty call?
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
