You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
