Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
