yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
27 People Confess The Worst Jobs They’ve Ever Had
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Be still, my beating vagina.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
3pm strippers are depressing
25 People Confess Their Terrifying Stalker Stories
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.